John McCain: Prompter Monkey Defined

CNN's Jeanne Moos is awesome. But you don't need us to tell you that. Moos chronicles how the man who hopes to lead the free world has issues reading from the TelePrompter. It has torn down many a good man, and John McCain is no exception.

Monkey Moment: Brett Who?

NBC's Norah O'Donnell once again proves that she is nothing more than a pretty face. Fave? Fav-ray? Ridiculous.



Monkey Meter: 5 bananas!

Monkey Moment: Stupid Viewers

Aren't the viewers who talk to TV stations the best? It seems as though everyone who witnesses a shooting, robbery or accident is a train wreck in progress. This less-than-bright woman is no exception. What can Brown do for her?

Monkey Meter: 4 bananas

Monkey Moment: Burnett's Monkey Shout-Out

It's not often that a Monkey Moment actually involves the word "monkey" but thanks to CNBC's Erin Burnett we can say this truly is one.

VIDEO: Here she is calling President Bush a monkey and here she is apologizing.

Newsbusters and Hot Air weigh in with their opinions.



Monkey Meter: 5 bananas

Local News: Drag Queen Brawl in Memphis!

Monkey Moment: Neighbor Confronts Bobby Knight

Local News: Are Your Friends Making You Fat?

This bit of hard-hitting journalism comes from the good people at KABB-FOX in San Antonio...



Monkey Meter (1-5): 3 bananas

Monkey Moment: Disaster in the Delta

This is a great compilation of crappy TV from WXVT in mosquito-infested Greenville, Mississippi (market #184). See if you can keep track of how many f-bombs are dropped. Also, our candidate for the Worst Last Name in the History of Television News pops up at the 4:32 mark. Enjoy...



Monkey Meter (1-5): Another 5 bananas. This one has it all.

Monkey Moment: FOX Business Blooper

Did you hear Apple is buying 8 percent of chipmaker AMD? Wait...what? Oh, they said Abu Dhabi! Here's the transcript. [via Huffington Post]

Monkey Meter (1-5): 4 bananas

Monkey Moment: Couric Bashes Rather, Looks Silly

Here's the original video Couric references...

Monkey Meter (1-5): 4 bananas

Local News: Ghost Caught on Tape?

A couple of days ago in Parma, Ohio a "ghost" was apparently captured on a gas station surveillance camera. We're kind of skeptical about this kind of thing over here in Monkey Land, but the video seems to speak for itself. Pranksters at work? A paranormal experience? You decide.



Monkey Meter (1-5): 5 bananas. Ghosts are almost as cool as monkeys.

Local News: Rage Caught on Tape in NYC!

A New York City dentist went into a violent rage after seeing that someone's car was blocking his way into a parking lot. Since it happened right outside their Westchester bureau, WCBS nabbed the exclusive video. And of course, the dentist eventually goes after the CBS 2 camera. When will people learn that bit of brilliant strategy never works? It's like running from a news helicopter. The person on the other end is always caught on camera looking like a dope. Do they think putting their hand over the lens and shoving the camera will make everything go away?

Monkey Meter (1-5): 5 bananas. The stupidity of people in front of news cameras never ceases to amaze.

Monkey Moment: Prompter Failure!

Courtesy of Curt Fonger at WPEC in West Palm...

Monkey Meter (1-5): 4 bananas. At least Fonger didn't freeze completely.

Monkey Moment: Fire at FOX News!

What an embarrassing display of stupidity outside of FOX News HQ in Manhattan. It was also an unbelievable waste of airtime. If you have 3:20 to kill, enjoy. But keep in mind, that's time you'll never get back. [via Johnny Dollar]

Monkey Meter (1-5): 4 bananas

Monkey Moment: Newscaster Faints, Set Falls

Monkey Meter (1-5): 3 bananas, simply because the other people in the studio were so slow to react.

Monkey Moment: Matt Lauer's Post is Missing!

Someone left Matt Lauer's mic on during one of the Today Show's weather segments and it sounds like a bandit made off with his newspaper. And what was Chris Cimino doing? Video here from The Huffington Post.

Monkey Meter (1-5): 3 bananas

Bad Scripts...

There is a great thread on Medialine's J Forum about script blunders. Here are some of the highlights:

"He was alive moments before he died."

An anchor onced asked a reporter in the field..."How close do you have to
be to a train to have your arm torn off?"

Anyone who says it's a "mute" point rather than "moot" point.

We once had a script about a man arrested for driving erratically. Anchor
said Erotically.

"A 30 year old woman was sexually assaulted last night in Midtown. Police
say that the woman was in her kitchen when the suspect approached from the rear and entered her backdoor."

Now that's the kind of stuff we're talking about!